Recently a good friend and I were discussing plans to get together over the holidays. She made a comment about needing to get her shit together. At the time, I offered the thought that she was doing great.

My friend asked me how I knew she was doing great. I replied she’s human and she’s amazing. I happen to know that she has a young son who is on the Autism spectrum and she is helping to take care of her two aging and ill parents. She’s doing a lot for her family. Is it perfect? Probably not. Does it need to be? Absolutely not. She’s showing up and that is everything.

Following our conversation, I started thinking about the phrase “getting my shit together”. I began thinking that maybe that’s not a thing. We hear it a lot, and I’m sure we’ve all had a similar thought at some point or another. But what if we’re all just human, doing the best we can and life is supposed to be messy. There’s no point where everything is perfect and clean and whole.

Maybe it’s enough that we show up, do our best, and not beat ourselves up because everything is packaged neatly in a box with a bow? What if we all just give ourselves a break and give ourselves and everyone around us grace.

So the next time you catch yourself or someone you love saying there is shit that needs to be together, remind yourself (or them) to take a breath and let it go. You’re doing enough. You are enough. It’s all going to be OK.